Changes in California Foster System

I’m a foster mom. I’ve been a foster mom for almost three years. While the system is by no means perfect, it does its best to provide a semblance of home for the thousands of children who are in the system. The foster system gives these children parents and a home. The children have a bed to call their own and a place. Children need a place. All the transitions involved with entering the foster system are so disruptive to children that anything we can do to be a calming and restorative influence is good. Permanency is the goal in … Continue reading →

CASA

What is CASA? CASA stands for Court Appointed Special Advocate. Far too many children each year are removed from their homes through no fault of their own. I can’t even begin to imagine the terror a child must feel when a stranger shows up to take him to stay with other strangers. Then there’s a never ending parade of more strangers. Those strangers can consist of police, caseworkers, judges, doctors, therapists, attorneys, teachers, social workers, foster homes, and more. It’s enough to make my head spin. CASA was developed to be a calm in the storm. CASA is made up … Continue reading →

Fostering is Rewarding

All my life I wanted to be a mother. To me there was nothing better than to eventually have someone call me Mom. I told a boss once about my aspirations to be a stay at home mom one day and she told me that only uneducated women wanted to do that. I felt so sorry for her narrow feminist viewpoint. In her world a woman could achieve success only by being a success in the corporate world. I’d like to see her try to wrangle a toddler and an infant. My dreams were not as easy to achieve as … Continue reading →

Paperwork

We’ve been foster parents since the first darling baby passed through our front door on November 2, 2007. We had been subjected to the rules, regulations, and classes for months prior so we should have been prepared for the mountains of paperwork that accompanied the bouncing baby girl. The Placement Authorization shows that a particular child has officially been given into our care. The Designation of Medical Consenter of Non-DFPS Employee allows us to make medical decisions on behalf of the foster child. We can’t take the child to the doctor or dentist without either of these forms. Just when … Continue reading →

Guardian Ad-Litem

What is a guardian ad-litem? In simplest terms the guardian ad-litem is a foster child’s attorney. The guardian ad-litem is the foster child’s advocate in all legal matters. He has the foster child’s best legal interests in mind. He is the foster child’s advocate in court. The majority of children have parents who love and care for them. Their parents are careful about what happens to them and take steps to make sure that their environments are appropriate. These children do not need guardians ad-litem to make decisions for them because they’re rarely going to end up in legal battles. … Continue reading →

Deciding to Foster Parent, Part 2

We went through PRIDE training with C.H.I.L.D, Congregations Helping In Love and Devotion. C.H.I.L.D. is a faith-based arm of CPS, and was over a single weekend instead of many weeks. Even though there were many at the informational meeting, there were few at the actual PRIDE training. After PRIDE training we still had to get certified in CPR and water safety. We did both and passed the TB test. Just when we thought our training was over, licensing would be happening soon, and a placement was near, we learned that another training had been added. We had to go through … Continue reading →

Deciding to Foster Parent, Part 1

We tried to conceive for over seven years. We had one failed IVF, three failed IUIs, three unsuccessful rounds of Clomid, and two miscarriages with D&C. So many disappointments and so much money wasted on the endeavor to birth a child. We didn’t want to adopt, but were open to it. Our attitude was that if God wanted us to adopt, He would make it perfectly clear. When we moved to Texas from California the first people we met lived across the street. They were in the process of adopting from China and helped to found the adoption ministry at … Continue reading →

Our Foster Placements

We got our first foster placement on November 2, 2007. The baby was the most beautiful thing. Pumpkin was 11 days old. She was a wonderful and easy baby. Our second placement followed closely on the heels of the first. I couldn’t hold fast to our plan to start slow and foster only one when we were told the child shared my sister and niece’s (her daughter) birthday. Gemini was 21 months old and so smart. She celebrated her second birthday in our home. She grew and changed so much in the four months she was a member of our … Continue reading →

National Adoption Day 2009

Jessie joined our family on September 11, 2008. She was placed in our home for adoption. It wasn’t until June 2, 2009, that we learned that what was promised was going to happen. We were going to be able to adopt our third foster placement. That was the happiest day since we graced our eyes upon her. The next thing we had to think about is what to do next. I had the names of two attorneys whom I spoke with when there were challenges to Jessie staying with us. I liked them both and each had a different take … Continue reading →

Book Review: Maybe Days: A Book for Kids in Foster Care

My last blog mentioned some books written to help foster care kids understand and come to terms with their experiences. I wanted to write a full review of another book, Maybe Days: a Book for Children in Foster Care. This book, labeled for ages 4-10 years, seems to me to be for somewhat older kids than The Star or Zachary’s New Home (books discussed in the last blog). It is written by Jennifer Wilgocki, M.S., a child and family therapist who presents training on attachment and bonding issues to professionals and foster parents. Dr. Marcia Wright is a clinical psychologist. … Continue reading →