We all know that it’s not right for a man to hit his wife. There are all kinds of protective agencies and laws in place, shelters for abused women, support groups that meet both online and in person. This is how it should be, but what about marriages in which the wife is abusive to the husband? It does happen. Most of the time, the husband is physically stronger than the wife, and if he’s the abuser, he can inflict a lot more damage. He can break her arms and ribs, give her concussions and bruises, and even cause wounds … Continue reading →

I’m LDS (a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, or Mormon) and I believe that marriage can and should last forever. My parents were divorced when I was a teenager, and this has reinforced my determination to keep my marriage alive and not to let anything happen to destroy it. One day, though, one very bad day, I contemplated divorce. Really, truly thought about it. We had been dealing with some issues in our marriage that didn’t originate with each other, but came along for the ride into our relationship. We had been on a rollercoaster, … Continue reading →

Following on from last week’s articles about resolving conflict in marriage, these are also good guidelines to follow. Once you have sat down and talked thought the situation, move on. Practice forgetfulness. Every time negative thoughts come back to you, practice putting them away by thinking about good qualities of your spouse and re-enforcing the idea that the problems are over and you have a clean slate. Don’t keep harping back to what has already gone on before and keeping score of wrongs and hurts. The ability to put aside hurts and get along with others is a sign of … Continue reading →

One of the biggest problems, where there is conflict in a marriage, is one person feeling they are not actually being heard. So it is important that you listen and acknowledge your spouse’s feelings. Even if you disagree or think they are misinterpreting events or comments, for the moment keep that to yourself. Just let them know firstly that you love them and are actually hearing what they are saying about how they are feeling. If you are too quick to jump in with your own opinions or own version of events, it will effectively shut them down and they … Continue reading →

If you and your spouse are having problems, what can you do? A lot will depend on how long the conflict has been going on, what it is about and how serious the issue is. But you need to sit down together and talk and work through the situation. Here are some suggestions you might like to consider adopting. If you are a believer then talk to God before you talk to your spouse. Ask God to change the heart of your spouse, so that he or she is receptive and prepared to listen to what you have to say. … Continue reading →

My husband has a stressful job. He’s good at handling difficult customers, and so that’s what he does all day—deals with customers no one else can placate. Most of the time, the disputes can be resolved quickly, and the customer is often laughing by the end of the conversation. But sometimes, the customer will not calm down. It’s against company policy for my husband to lose his temper, so he has to maintain an image of calm no matter what the situation. After a long day of complaint after complaint, he’s usually ready to crawl under a rock and never … Continue reading →