Opposites attract but only up to a point. According to Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott,one of the main reasons many couples break up is that they have not enough in common. This can happen early in a marriage or even sometimes, as it seems recently in growing numbers, after the children have moved out of home. Couples find they have nothing in common. Nothing left to talk about.
A solution to this might be to take up a hobby or sport together. Before I broke my arm which has out me put of action for months, Mick and I played tennis regularly with a group of men and women. We also have a great interest in live theatre and in AFL (Australian football) as well as music, though at times our music taste is very dissimilar. But there are other times when it comes together. We also share a love of reading and even though we rarely read the same books, we can still always talk about what we are reading and points of interest. Yesterday I came across some interesting gardening tips in novel was reading about a woman with a landscape gardening business, so of course I shared them with Mick.
Gordon and Lee-Anne Twyford of Berry found Latin American dancing to be a hobby they could share. They have become so engrossed in their hobby they recently took part in the Australian Championships, and won one of the sections.
Another couple I know did a computer and desktop publishing course together. They were able to encourage each other through it, when one of them got stuck.
The other area that is a sticking point for people in marriage is when they realize that their religious beliefs or values are not aligned. This sometimes may not show up till after children arrive on the scene unless the couple is careful to discuss these topics before they get married which I would encourage.
Attitudes towards birth control and child rearing are also another sticking point for some couples, so talking this out beforehand is an advisable idea.
Another problem area is where one person is the relationship does not feel supported or encouraged by the other person or feels they are not being considered and listened to.
More thought and talking about tings beforehand will result in less stressful situations after the marriage takes place. It is a lot more stress and emotional upheaval to go through divorce than it is to break up before the marriage takes place if you decide things are incompatible.
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