Of course we cannot run our households like businesses…or can we? Are there some basic business practices that can be adjusted to fit the average single parent household? One area where I think it can be helpful is to have some basic household “policies.” How will you handle extra-curricular expenses? What will be your stance on “sick days” from school? How will your family deal with chores or behavior infractions? Instead of thinking in terms of set rules, it might be helpful to develop family policies to guide you in overseeing your family.
To share an example, our family “sick day” policy is as follows: if the child is truly sick or has asked me in advance for a mental health day, then I will excuse the absence. This means that a cold, migraine headache, or flu are all perfectly excusable absences. Also, if a child has been working hard and is just feeling exhausted or overwhelmed or stressed (at the end of a tough week of tests, for example) and they come and chat with me about it in advance and we arrange for them to take the day off, I will excuse it. If the child chooses to skip or gets to school late, then I will not excuse the absence. I have had some pretty terse conversations with school officials who wanted to know why I would let my children have unexcused absences on their records and I told them that our family policy was that I was not going to lie or cover up for their personal irresponsible choices and they would have to face the consequences. Having a set policy that my kids understand has eliminated the power struggles in our household—they know the score.
Part of being consistent and having logical consequences means deciding where you stand on things and what will be the priorities of your family situation. Having set family policies on key issues can give your family some good basic structure.
See Also: The Rules Should Apply to Everyone
Creating House Rules for Your Boomerang Child