I admit that all those years ago when I imagined becoming a parent, I assumed that they would be coming to me for advice and asking my opinions on things—I did not anticipate that I would be hearing so many unsolicited opinions from my children! While I know this is not unique to single parent households, I also know that our kids may feel as though they have more freedom to speak and to offer up their ideas and opinions to us single parents—and we might not always be thrilled to hear them…
As my kids have gotten older, they have become increasingly opinionated. I know that part of it is because I have never been the sort of parent to squash their communication or force them to respect me as the ultimate authority. We also talk about things in our household and always have. Now, they tend to offer opinions in ways that I never would. While I hope they outgrow it, I still have to cope with it in the here and now.
Normally, I will either ignore their comments, or say something like “Thank you for your opinion.” That is it. I want to acknowledge that it is *their opinion* and not a fact and also not put more stock into it than I need to. When I was a kid, I remember adults saying things like “When I want your opinion, I’ll ask for it!” and that just sounded so rude. Occasionally, I will also say something like: “This is my choice to make” or “Thank you for your input, but this is my decision.” It feels to me like a way of acknowledging that the child has shared something, but also letting them know that I am the one making the choice or decision for myself.