The concept of courtship or courting is really a precursor to the modern-era of dating. In ‘traditional’ courting, it is a highly structured series of activities and the rules are very specific. To court someone involves seeing him or her in a structured atmosphere, usually with a chaperone of some type.
To court in modern society would involve invitations to events where the intended will be. Parties held by mutual friends, outings with other couples and so forth. These controlled ‘dates’ would allow the couple to get to know each other without undue stress of maintaining personal images.
It’s worth noting that in modern, Western societies courtship is often seen as an archaic social tradition. Where courting was a very specific activity aimed towards finding a spouse, dating is about getting together socially, having a good time and relaxing. Because dating has so many meanings in modern society, it’s definitely not focused on the idea of hunting for a spouse.
While committed couples do date, the idea of a ‘date’ is not about the commitment or the relationship so much as a social evening between two people. While courting was an exclusive activity between two individuals because society frowned on courting multiple partners, dating as a social activity is about seeing multiple people. There are other terms used for exclusivity including boyfriend, girlfriend or ‘going steady’ or ‘going out.’
The idea of courting before dating is actually a very modern one. In traditional societies, courtship would be concluded by marriage. In modern society, dating is not conclusively ended with marriage. Rather a series of different dating relationships may end in one relationship settling on marriage. A conservative movement in the United States has actually begun endorsing a more traditional form of courtship prior to allowing young people to date.
Because the idea of courtship is to find a marriage partner, a courtship can then be followed by a more modern dating relationship. It should be noted that in almost all relationships involving courting, sexual relations are frowned on and discouraged. If young people are successfully paired through a courtship, a more modern dating relationship may persist, but they would still be discouraged from a sexual relationship. Marriage is, of course, the ultimate goal and sexual involvement is the final precipice to crossing in the courtship to dating to marriage equation.
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