Date Rape is when someone you are dating forces or manipulates you into having sex when you really don’t want to. Regardless of your relationship with that person, even if you love and trust them, sex without your clear and un-pressured “yes,” is rape. Rape is against the law. Many people wrongly think that because their date paid for dinner, movies, coffee, etc, that they are expected to repay the favor by having sex. WRONG. When I invite people to dinner, or pay for their coffee when I go out, I certainly do not expect them to sleep with me. I pay because I want to or because it is a mark of respect.
There are a few warning signs to alert you to potential date rape. If you’re dating a man or boy that thinks that:
• Sex is their right,
• Women and girls are lesser beings, or
• Force or violence is okay,
they are bad news. RUN NOW. You cannot change their thinking and you are at risk of being raped or bashed.
Before you go out on a date alone, watch out for those males that:
• Do a lot of unwanted touching,
• Invade your space,
• Make suggestive or crude sexual comments to you or about other women and girls,
• Interrupt you,
• Take no notice of what you say,
• Put women down,
• Can’t admit to being in the wrong, or
• Use violence to solve problems.
The above are risk factors – early warning signs that a relationship with this person may end in misery and harm for you. Do not be fooled by all the nice things they also say: they are only doing it to try to win you over, to trick you into having sex with them.
When you start dating, always let someone else know where you are going – a safety friend. If your plans change, ring and update your safety friend.
If you are, or have been date raped, it is not your fault. Date rape is against the law and is always the responsibility of the boy/man who has committed it.
Real men do not rape. Real men respect women and allow a woman to take her time to make up her own mind about entering into a sexual relationship.
End Date Rape – TELL people about the bad, unacceptable and illegal behaviors of your date. He doesn’t respect you, respect yourself by breaking his disrespect.