Being snubbed by our children or ignored in a general way is never pleasant. For some of us parents, it can be the thing that really triggers us. Surely, being ignored isn’t “owned” by single parents, but without another adult in the house to balance things out, being ignored by our kids can be aggravating at the least, and make things uncomfortable and stressful as well.
In my own experience, being ignored by my kids for whatever reason can have a little bit of both blessing and aggravation in it. If they are ignoring me when I am trying to get them to do something, respond to a question, or have a conversation, I can get quite annoyed. If they are just so wrapped up in their own stuff that I get snubbed for a while, I can actually appreciate the little reprieve. Regardless, I find the key is to not take it personally—not always easy for a single parent who needs those interactions with our kids to help us keep a healthy family scene. If there was another adult in the house, we would have someone to commiserate with and to remind us not to take it personally—but when it is just us being ignored by our child, it can feel painful and isolating.
You can also try shaking things up and instead of trying to force your child’s acknowledgement, do something unexpected and playful—write them a giant note, singe a song with your comments or message in it or send an e-mail or text message. When my kids were younger, I could do dorky things like have the cat “talk” to them or some inanimate object and they would either chuckle or lighten up. Just remember not to take it personally or try to force the issue until you are locked in a fight or power struggle. We can learn how to be more comfortable and confident with ourselves so it doesn’t feel like a big deal when we are being ignored, and we can give things a little time to get back to normal.
Also: The Do Not Ignore List
The PARENTS Blog