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Dealing with homeschool cricitism

I was having a meal at church and a friend said to me, “out of all the people I know who homeschool, only you and (another person) are doing a good job”. They continued with not everyone’s kids are as advanced as yours are. I understand this person’s point, as just yesterday, I asked a homeschooled teen to fill out a form, and they literally bluffed their way through it, and I ended up filling it out myself except for their name. I suspect that this child could not read.

Just as in public school, it is clear that some kids will excel and some will not. The problem comes in the judgments that follow. When kids are in public schools and not doing well, there is usually a diagnosis of a learning disability, or the parents are blamed for the child’s failure. In the case of homeschooled children who are not excelling, there could also be a learning disability that the parents have had evaluated, but in all of these cases, the parent is blamed for the child not excelling.

My point is, who am I or you to make a judgment about what we don’t know. Just because every homeschooled child is not as advanced as my kids does not mean they are a failure. In fact, for many, it is a miracle that they turned out average based on actual disabilities that they have overcome.

I was prompted to write this based on a question in the homeschool forums, when the question was asked, “How do you deal with criticism?” In my case, few people actually criticize me, per-se, while relatives do ask a lot of questions. Still, people think it is OK to ask me to make judgments about other homeschoolers. In these cases, I ignore the question if I find it terribly inappropriate, or I ask them if they know anything about the children’s schooling, any disabilities, or anything else about the family and inform them that I could not judge without all of the information. Either way, the usually ends quickly. In the few cases where there may have actually been an issue, I have informed the concerned person to have a conversation with the parent to see if they could do anything to help.

What are your homeschoolers doing this summer?

Ending the School Year: Or Not