I’m starting to get fed up here.
I’m not fed up by any means with my husband or my marriage, relatives included, but by all of the marriage cynicism I have been encountering lately. From the best Seller, Eat, Pray Love,” to friends who would rather cohabitant than commit (“marriage is for unenlightened breeders, unless you need a green card.” Don’t shoot the messenger) to married couples who complain about being married.
While I really don’t think that everyone should be married, I am struck by how much passion there is against the institution. Where did all of the cynicism come from? Perhaps from bad marriages.
It is tough, I think, to extol the virtues of marriage, the studies that show married men are happier and live longer, the personal experiences of mutual benefit, the focus on the positive aspects of marriage and family, etc., when once seemingly happy couples are notching up the divorce statistics. Or when you hear of yet another husband or wife who decided to make pursuing an outside relationship more important than his or her own marriage. Why bother with this kind of mess?
Still, I am pretty grounded in the virtues of being married, specifically for me to my specific husband. I can’t speak for anyone else though.
Recently, someone asked me, why bother being married, especially if you don’t plan on having children together, as if children is the only reason for marriage. There are other “practical” reasons that come up of course–being able to make medical decisions, health insurance, financial benefits., etc. But for me, I find that one honest simple answer works best to answer such cynicism: “We were already married when we met. It was just a matter of stepping into it.” And that is truly how I feel.
You can read more blog posts by Mary Ann Romans here!
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