A few years ago when my daughter was born, I wrote the following letter and put it into her baby book. Since then, I’ve added notes and other letters periodically to the baby book. Someday, likely on her 18th birthday, I’ll give her these missives and notes.
Dear Baby,
Welcome, as I write this, you are sleeping soundly and securely in the little bed next to my own. We’ve been home from the hospital less than 24 hours and I don’t think I’ve had three consecutive hours of sleep. I keep waking up to look at you. It’s odd to think that just three days ago – you weren’t here yet. It seems even less possible that a week and half ago, I was eating Thanksgiving dinner and wondering if this pregnancy would ever be over.
I don’t mind telling you that when they first laid you against my tummy – I couldn’t imagine what I would feel and despite all the books I’ve read and all the stories I’ve heard – nothing could compare to the emotion that filled me as I looked down at your very icky and wet head. You had a ton of hair, which seemed to match all the heartburn I had throughout my pregnancy – everyone told me lots of heartburn meant lots of hair.
I counted your fingers and your toes. I laughed when you pooped on me. The nurse started to clean it off while the doctor was working with the umbilical and I remember commenting rather wryly – her first act in this world is to poop on me – is this a sign of things to come? The room erupted with laughter. Yes, there were a lot of people on hand to see you brought into this world – your dad for one – he was a real trooper and our doctor – she was great.
I was scared that I wouldn’t know what to do or how to feel – but that’s like a fading memory now. I know how I feel and I know how much I love you and you’re a lot easier to take care of than I imagined – but wow are you tiny. I know everyone says you’re a big baby and maybe you are – but you have the tiniest hands and the tiniest feet.
You’re going to wake up soon and you’re going to make this great whistling noise because you have what the doctors are calling laryngeal malasia – there is something wrong with your vocal cords – they aren’t too worried about it at the moment – so I’ll go with their advice – we’ll keep an eye on it. Right now it just means you’re a noisy baby – but I can handle the noise – I’ve already noticed the differences between when you are sleeping, awake, fussy or playing – and it’s only been 3 days – wait till it’s been a week!
Oh – by the way – I should mention this now – the idea that you’re a night owl when I’m an early bird isn’t working for me. I apologize if you’re an early bird now – but I won’t tell you that I didn’t do that on purpose! Love you lots — Mom.
Have you ever written a letter to your baby?