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Defining Real Love

What is love? What does it mean to you? When we’re young, love means safety and security. It means comfort and it means fun. As we grow, love takes on an almost inadequate description of our feelings. It is used in such a carefree manner in the first stages of a relationship.

It is during this period that our definitions of love take on an almost unrealistic meaning. Likely because we say it often in the earliest stages of a relationship that may see its lifetime peak and end in under 2 weeks. As we become young adults, our skewed versions of love are colored by our personal experiences.

If you were likely to say I love you very quickly, then you have a fluid definition. If I love you is something you’ve never said, your definition may be far more extreme and harder to identify. So what is love? How do we define it?

One of the best descriptions for love I have ever read or seen is that love wants to give. Love wants to give so much it can hardly wait. It wants to give smiles, it wants to give laughter and it wants to give excitement. It’s similar to the thrill you get when you watch someone open a present you have given them. Their pleasure flushes you with pleasure.

When someone wants to know whether they are in love with someone or in lust with them – you can find the difference in the idea that lust can’t wait to receive. Lust wants presents. It wants gifts. It wants attention.

Now, there is absolutely nothing wrong with being in love and in lust with someone. After all, love and lust can go hand in hand and often do in marriages. However, love – at least as I have found it to be in my definition wants to give. It wants to please. It wants to help. It wants to experience the feeling of helping the loved one to smile and to be happy.

Love puts self second. That’s real definition of love.

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About Heather Long

Heather Long is 35 years old and currently lives in Wylie, Texas. She has been a freelance writer for six years. Her husband and she met while working together at America Online over ten years ago. They have a beautiful daughter who just turned five years old. She is learning to read and preparing for kindergarten in the fall. An author of more than 300 articles and 500+ web copy pieces, Heather has also written three books as a ghostwriter. Empty Canoe Publishing accepted a novel of her own. A former horse breeder, Heather used to get most of her exercise outside. In late 2004, early 2005 Heather started studying fitness full time in order to get herself back into shape. Heather worked with a personal trainer for six months and works out regularly. She enjoys shaking up her routine and checking out new exercises. Her current favorites are the treadmill (she walks up to 90 minutes daily) and doing yoga for stretching. She also performs strength training two to three times a week. Her goals include performing in a marathon such as the Walk for Breast Cancer Awareness or Team in Training for Lymphoma research. She enjoys sharing her knowledge and experience through the fitness and marriage blogs.