One of the boldest arguments that I’ve ever heard against homeschooling is to compare children. When my son did not know how to write his letters or the sounds of the letters by age 4, people around us were up in arms about our homeschooling practices. One particular acquaintance pointed out that her son was in an all day preschool program and he could write all of his letters and numbers and knew most of their sounds. Perhaps it was time to admit that I’m not so good at this homeschooling thing after all.
Meanwhile, my poor illiterate son was designing experiments to explain inertia, learning about plants and cross-pollination, and explaining trajectory in action while we drove through a tornado. He actually remained “illiterate” until just recently when he learned the sounds of his letters, as well as their names, as well as how to combine them to make three letter words. . .in just a few days. So technically, if we were comparing students, I could tell my friend that what it took her son a whole year to learn, mine picked up in a week! But we’re not supposed to compare, right?
What Your Well Meaning Friends Don’t Realize
When did your child start walking? At 9 months? At 14 months? Or somewhere in between? Any one of those three answers are within the range of what is considered normal. Likewise, reading is a developmental process. While it is normal to begin reading at four, it is also normal to begin reading as late as 9 or 10. Even research shows that kids who learn to read late, casting aside those blessed phonics to learn about nature or geography, learn to read more quickly, and with less frustration than kids who learned to read earlier. That same research also shows that kids who learn to read later do better in academic subjects because they’re able to bring a greater wealth of experience and thus a deeper comprehension for what they’re reading. But I doubt your friend (or mine) has read this study.
The Science of Institutionalized Education
How do you deal with thousands of kids and make sure that they are all learning to read and write and do arithmetic competently? You decide in which grade, and thus how old each child will be when they learn something. Plants? That’s 3rd grade. State capitals? They learn that in 2nd grade here. Adding? 1st grade. There simply is no other way to do it effectively–if you’re a school system.
If you’re homeschooling however, you are allowed to make up your own scope and sequence. My daughter will study states and their capitals, U.S. presidents etc., when we study U.S. history in the next two years. Is she behind? Hardly–I would counter that it is unlikely her schooled peers will learn the geography she knows until they are in middle school. However, the point here is that you cannot look at a specific grade level, but rather, you must look at the whole picture.
The End Justifies the Means
Whether you homeschool or send your children to school, I hope you have educational goals for your children. I have yet to meet a good parent who doesn’t. Think about those goals for a minute, maybe even pause and write them down. Does any one of them occur within a year?
My own goals for my children, educationally speaking are as follows:
* I want them to love learning.
* I want them to know where to go get an answer that they don’t know.
* I want them to love to read and read frequently and voraciously as both their father and I do.
* I want them to use their knowledge, wisdom and skills to serve other people.
Not a single one of those goals rests on their ability at this moment, to name 50 state capitals. I’m not at all saying throw out the state capitals, or any other subject matter. Just that the different academic things you do in one year really are one means to some final goals. And the final goals are a lot bigger than the small pocket of knowledge my children are acquiring right now.
So the next time someone seems shocked that your child doesn’t know such and such, just smile and nod. You can rest assured in knowing that your child doesn’t have to know what so and so knows. Keep that in front of you as you focus on your end goal: well educated children!
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