When my ex husband and I first split he had a hard time finding his role again. He wasn’t there all the time, we didn’t live together anymore, so how was he supposed to play the dad role in our son’s life? Every time he would come to pick Logan up he would take him out to a nice breakfast and take him to the toy store to pick something out, and it was never just a little something, either. He would come home with huge trucks, balls, lawn mowers, shovels, you name it he got it. After the first couple of weeks I was running out of room to put these new treasures he was coming home with every few days.
Of course Logan looked forward to going with Dad. He got to go out to eat wherever he wanted and got to choose a cool new toy! What kid wouldn’t get excited about that? Unfortunately gifts can never be a substitute for time and attention. Logan didn’t just want presents, he wanted someone to get down on the floor and play with them with him. He wanted someone who would take him outside and throw the new ball around.
As time went on my ex started to figure things out a little better. He lost his job and couldn’t afford to buy the biggest and best toys anymore. He couldn’t take him out to all the fancy restaurants all the time. It was time to get back to the basics. He had to figure out how to be a dad all over again. Now he takes him to the park and to feed the ducks by the Jordan River and Logan couldn’t be happier. No matter how many toys he gets, there is never any substitute for time and affection.