If you didn’t get along during your marriage, chances are you aren’t getting along any better now that you’re divorced. I’ve gotten pretty good at taking control of my happiness, except when it comes to my ex husband. He is the one person that knows me well enough to make me feel about two inches tall. He knows how much I avoid confrontation and he often uses that to his advantage. He can make me feel worse than just about anyone I know.
Unfortunately, you’re going to have to deal with your ex for the rest of your life. He is the father of your children so you have to find a way to take back control of your emotions. It’s normal for an ex to try and make you sound like the bad guy, from his perspective, you probably are. You have to learn to let these things roll off. In the end, you know that you are a good person and that you are doing everything you can. It doesn’t matter what other people think of you, it only matters what you think of yourself. We all have things we need to improve on as individuals, it’s natural to feel insecure about those things every once in a while, but the important thing is that you are being the very best person you can be.
If you are really struggling, you may want to consider seeing a counselor. They don’t fix the problem, but they often give you tools to be able to fix things yourself. Many insurances cover a certain number of visits a year. If nothing else, they give you a fresh perspective on things so that you are able to see things more clearly from someone who is less intimately involved in the situation. Take the power back. No one should have the power to make you unhappy, and that includes your ex.