There are very few of us who really do not care a lick what other people think of us. As single parents, we might worry that people are looking at us and judging us and for many of us—the ones we worry MOST about in terms of approval and disapproval are the people who are closest to us—our family and friends. While a little feeling of concern and connection can help us to feel attached and to make sensible choices, too much worry about what others’ think or say can really hold us back.
Several weeks ago, I was talking to someone who confessed that she would like to have another child but that her sister did not approve. It caught me off guard since I could not imagine needing a sister’s approval to add to one’s family but it was apparent that this person put a great deal of stock in what her family members said. She was not exactly convinced that they had her best interest in mind, but she craved their approval and said she needed their “blessings.” I have knows of people who were unwilling to get married, take a job, move or buy a car because they did not have the “blessings” of those closest to them. To my way of thinking, this seems like a cop-out—a way to NOT make choices and decisions on one’s own.
How much stock are you putting into whether or not others approve of what you are doing? Are you handing over your power and individuality in hopes that your family and friends will like you and give the golden stamp of approval on who you date, your job, your friends or the type of children you have? At some point, our life needs to become our own and seeking others’ blessings can actually hold us back from being ourselves and achieving our own dream.