You know that saying “Food is love”? Well, if you grew up thinking that way, you may just be suffering the circumstances. If you don’t realize it, you may just be teaching your children the same thing.
I grew up thinking this way. When I was going through my particularly difficult teen years, both my parents worked full time and neither was ever in much of a mood or mindset to talk to their daughter about how difficult it can be to be a teenager. Thinking that food might be an in for me, I took action. One day, I came home from school and made an elaborate dinner for the family. When my parents arrived home from work, they were thrilled. I’d finally found the key to getting their attention. This sort of thing continued until I finally moved out of my parents’ home. It didn’t make my teen years any easier but it was the only way I knew to get the attention I was starving for.
When I did move out and lived on my own, I developed another unhealthy relationship with food. Life isn’t easy when you’re on your own and trying to make a living without a college degree. Especially when you grow up conditioned to believe you should marry your high school sweetheart, settle down and have a family. I was almost there. Then my high school sweetheart cheated on me.
That was when I began self-medicating with food.
We all have different reasons for it, but if you’ve done it, you understand what I mean by self-medicating. Anything starchy or sweet that would trigger serotonin was my medication of choice. I didn’t binge. I just needed enough to take the edge off. Starch and sugar did it for me. I became an addict.
I still suffer from this sort of addiction but the difference now is that I know what it is and why I do it. Now, when the need for starch or sugar hits me, I usually know why and it is most often an emotional issue. If I can stop long enough to think about it, I can usually stop myself from self-medicating.
Do you self-medicate with food? Do you know why? Can you control it?
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