I don’t know what’s going on, but I have to say something. Is it just me, or are more and more folks falling asleep at church? I mean, okay, I’ve heard the jokes for years across all denominations, but until recently, I don’t think I’ve seen so many folks dozing as I have in the past month or two.
Let me tell you the story of the first talk I ever gave in church. I hadn’t been a member for more than nine months, maybe less than that. I had recently moved, so I didn’t know a lot of people. Like most people speaking in public, I was nervous, but I reminded myself something I learned years ago – pick out a point over everyone’s head and look at that rather than the people. When I started speaking, I turned my eyes to a spot just above the middle of the back row. In the seat directly below said spot, a guy sat with his arms folded and his eyes shut, sleeping. Of course, I began wondering – was my talk that boring? Was it that bad?
In the past few weeks, I’ve caught a bunch of folks asleep at the wheel. Mind you, I had a home teacher who worked as a night guard and came straight from work to church when I was in the singles ward, and I currently know a woman who works at a mental hospital and does the same thing. Neither of these folks – folks who have already chosen to cut out sleep over church – have ever been caught snoozing. I’ll admit, I’ve had days when I felt like curling up on the chapel seats and going to sleep. But sleeping in church?
Maybe if you are part of a church with several thousand members, it’s not quite so bad. But even in our largest wards, a sleeping member is fairly obvious, especially once you split up into Sunday School or Relief Society. And, as a teacher who had TWO people (out of maybe ten) sleeping a few weeks ago, I have to tell you, it’s a bit disconcerting. Sure, it’s the dozer’s choice – and problem – but it still makes you doubt yourself. You get a little more nervous, taking the Zzzs as implied criticism. And, like the elephant in the room, it’s really tough to take your eyes off of them.
If you’re one of the sleepers, wake up. Remember, you’re here to enjoy the spirit, and you can’t really do that if you’re conked out (well, maybe you can have some really spiritual dreams). Focus.
In the meantime, I’m thinking about following in the footsteps of my high school physics teacher. He kept a tennis ball on his desk and would knock any sleepers on the head with it. We didn’t have many people catching 40 winks in his class.
Related Articles:
Finding Energy While Following the Word of Wisdom
Gospel Doctrine: Climb the Tree
Sunday Review: Quick to Observe