Many parents worry about whether or not their child is developing appropriately when it comes to social skills. This can be a hard one since all children are different and our kids may be very different from us, and/or very different from their siblings socially. Some like to play in big groups, others are happier playing alone or with one other friend. Overall, I think that if a child is showing signs of enjoyment—enjoying playing with other children at least some of the time, and empathy—caring how other people feel or if they get hurt or upset, then social skills are likely on target.
Of course, I am not an expert, just a seasoned parent who has led my share of scouting groups and coached my share of sports teams, so I am basing my theory on experience rather than expertise—but, with there being so many different types of children with various social skill levels—parents really do worry about whether their child is too aggressive or too meek or even “normal.” We put a lot of stock on social adjustment in our society, and as parents, we often want our children to be more socially secure than we imagine ourselves to be.
When you watch your child interacting with other kids, does she seem overly aggressive or anxious? If he or she really isn’t ever having any fun or caring about the playmates at all — then there might be cause to worry and seek some professional help to assist the child in developing social skills and working toward good social adjustment. But, if he or she is generally having a good time (even if it is in a big group, or one-on-one if that is the temperament) and the child is developing empathy over time—then social development probably on track.
Also: Teaching Typical Kids How to Play With Developmentally Delayed Peers
Mommy, Tell Me a Social Story!