We all have different fears throughout our lives. After a divorce it seems that many of those fears are intensified. I was deathly afraid of another marriage. My first marriage had failed miserably and I couldn’t bear the thought of going through that pain again. Ultimately I knew that I wanted to be able to have a family again, but I wasn’t sure I was ready to feel the vulnerability that would come with that. I wasn’t ready to run the risk of that kind of rejection again. My divorce had taken such a toll on my self-esteem, I wasn’t sure I could face all of those fears again.
As time went on new fears developed. I had gotten comfortable with being on my own again. I liked the independence I was feeling now that I wasn’t relying on a husband to support me. I was happy on my own. I didn’t need a man to take care of us anymore; it felt good to do it on my own. Deep down, I still had the desire to have a family, but now I had a fear that I would have to give up my independence to have that as well. I was torn. I knew that in order to meet my ultimate goal of having a family again I was going to have to face my fears head on. This meant risking emotional pain, but I had to be willing to go through the inevitable trials in order to reach that goal.
Facing your fears isn’t always easy. It takes courage. You have to be willing to go through hard things in order to overcome your fears and reach your goals. If you let your fears consume you, you prohibit yourself from finding true happiness. Life is meant for joy; don’t let your fears keep you from finding it.