The other night, I attended yet another parent open house. I have been to so many of these over the years that I’ve lost count. Now my children are older teenagers and nearly done with public school–my years of volunteering in the classroom, draped with my proud child-student are long gone. When I was at the open house, several teachers invited the parents to come and visit and sit in on their child’s class or even volunteer. I couldn’t help but think how I would have felt at seventeen if my mom came in to sit in class–it would have ruined my entire year!
I just wouldn’t do that to my teenagers. After all, we are in the months of transitioning from living at home to a potentially more independent life of college student or, at least, high school graduate. I wrote the other day about “helicopter parents” and I cannot help but think a parent sitting in on a child’s senior literature class would count as not only embarrassing, but also just inappropriate.
Okay, does that mean our volunteer days are over? No, I don’t think so. I think that parents of teenagers can find ways to volunteer without being a steady presence in the halls at school or even the library or office during school hours. Serving on a committee, fund raising, helping “behind the scenes,” helping in the office, and tutoring during non-school hours are permissible I think. Chaperoning dances, helping as an aide in a class where a teen is a student, and other high profile volunteer positions just may do more harm than good. Of course, it depends on the child but I think that by the ages of 16, 17 and 18–having mom or dad sitting in the back of the classroom may be the very LAST thing a child wants to remember as part of the high school experience.
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