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Getting to Know your “Real Child”

I have written before about how different my two kids are. Part of that stems from having one boy and one girl, however, most of that comes from some sort of unique personality make-up that I believe they were born with. My sister and I have had many discussions about this when discussing various behavior problems with both her children and mine. There is a lot we can do to shape and mold are kids, but deep down, they are their own unique selves, and it is our job to help them discover who that person truly is and who they are meant to be.

My daughter starts Kindergarten in 3 days. I’m anxious. I can see as the day gets closer that she might be getting a little nervous, too. Although, I believe she is mostly excited. This year will help us as parents uncover a lot about her, I’m sure. When a child is in the safety net of their own home, perhaps it is easy to overlook some of the struggles that they might feel internally. For example, I only see my kids interactions with each other and us, their parents, for the most part. I can’t see deep inside to what they are feeling at every moment, or how they might struggle in another situation.

I ran across an article titled, “Five-facet reviews of your children” and loved the idea! We believe that we have the same personalities now that existed before we ever came to earth. These personalities make up our spiritual selves. We also believe that when we die, we will take those same personality traits with us. Both, good and bad. So, helping a child uncover their true, real, spiritual self seems like an essential role for a parent to play. But, how do we do it?

This article discusses one parenting method, involving both parents sitting down once a month and discussing each child as an individual, and the five facets of the child’s life. You discuss how they are doing in each one. They include:

1. socially

2. spiritually

3. mentally

4. emotionally

5. physically

Can you imagine if every parent could do this? How much more tuned in would we be to our children? How much better parents would we be if we could help them work through some issues they might be having that we otherwise may have never noticed?

I sometimes worry about the teenage years with my kids. I worry that maybe they will shut down, close up, and never talk to me again. But, I think starting early is the key. If we can realize that each child has their own unique problems, struggles, and personalities and it is our job to help them uncover both the good and the bad, then maybe before we ever get to those teenage years that so many of us worry about, we will at least be tuned in. I know I can’t wait to work on this with my husband as the years seem to be coming faster and faster. Before we know it, we’ll turn around and realize they have all grown up, and I just pray that I will have helped them become the “real” person that they were meant to be.

Related Articles:

Though Hard to You…

He is a Parent Too

Is the Mormon Stay at Home Mom Happy?

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About Meredith

Meredith is a native Texan who is currently living in Salt Lake City, UT. She graduated from the University of Utah in 2002 with a B.A. degree in Psychology and a minor in Human Development and Family Studies. She has been married for almost 10 years and has three beautiful children who consume most of her time. However, she started blogging in 2007 and has fallen in love with the idea of becoming a writer. She started scrapbooking over 10 years ago, and has become obsessed with that as well. She also dreams of the day when someone will pay her to scrapbook for them! When she is not scrapbooking, or blogging, she loves to people watch, and analyze what makes people tick. Meredith is proud to be a Mormon, and even served a mission for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints where she fell in love with the Latin culture and learned to speak Spanish. Visit Meredith on her personal blog at www.fakingpictureperfect.wordpress.com