When our children are very young, we sort of set goals for them—we have our own ideas of what they should be doing, and where they should be developmentally at certain stages. As they age, however, most of us parents learn to ease up on our own goals for our children and expect them to start setting goals on their own. This does not come naturally or easily for many children, however, and they may need some help learning how…
We are all so different! Some of us need check lists and very specifically defined goals to work toward, while others of us prefer more of an abstract approach to life. I have found, however, that even those children who don’t respond well to regiment and check lists, do like to have some things they are striving and working for—even if it is just emancipation and getting to do whatever they want all day without “being told what to do!” Setting personal goals, and staying on track to meet them doesn’t come easily for everyone, however.
In teaching kids how to work with goals, it is important to take into account the temperament of the child. Do they respond well to direction, or need to feel in charge of their own future? Do they have personal interests that inspire them, or are they just free-floating in search of a mission? Even setting small goals like learning to type or scoring 2 soccer goals during the season can be encouraging. As children learn that they can set their own personal goals (without being expected to meet someone else’s expectations), they usually develop confidence and become increasingly self motivated. As parents, we can encourage this process with modeling our own goal-setting and sharing with our children how to set larger goals, break them down into stepping stones or tasks, and how to encourage and celebrate the process along the way to reaching an established goal.
Also: Young Women: Five Tips to Help Your Girls Become Leaders
Time to Take Off the Training Wheels
Seven Habits to Raising or Teaching Successful Teens