Holidays just aren’t the same when the person you love can’t be there. Whether your husband or wife is away on extended business, is deployed with the military, or can’t be there for any other reason, it feels like part of you is missing.
I’ve had to face holidays without my husband, and it isn’t easy. He generally isn’t gone for very long, so I’m thankful for that. I usually try to just hold off and have our celebration at a later date if he’ll be home soon after, which is one thing you might consider doing if your spouse is only away for a short time.
What else can you do? It helps if you can at least hear his or her voice on the special day. Can you call or can he or she call you? Even that isn’t always possible, but when it is it can make a difference. You can also write or send him or her a special card. Include a picture of yourself if you haven’t seen each other for a while.
Tell your kids funny stories about Mom or Dad and let them express their feelings over your spouse’s absence. It’s sad that we can’t always be together with our loved ones, especially during the holidays. When I find myself in this situation, I try to remember that it’s temporary and that I know he’ll be home eventually.
I’ve also found that it’s important for me to remain upbeat when I talk to my husband. Early on, I cried and lamented about how much I missed him. It only made him feel worse about being gone, even though he couldn’t help it. Now, I try to stay up, stay positive, and then tell him simply that I miss him and love him before we say goodbye.
I’m still not sure if he’s going to be here in time for Thanksgiving. I know it’s not the same as what some of you are facing, and I feel for you. I hope that your spouse will soon be home to share every holiday with you in the future.
What tips would you give others who are missing their spouses during the holidays?