This time of year waxes nostalgic for reunions of all kinds. The problem is that some reunions not only are unplanned but are unwanted as well. The key issue is how can you tactfully, but with malice aforethought, head off your guests at the pass before they dare to darken your threshold and mess up (and stress up) your life?
One way to control the situation is a little thing called a white lie. I am honest and a bad liar to boot. Whenever I tell a small, social lie to get out of some social occasion, it always backfires right in my face. Sometimes, however, a well planned, strategically placed, teeny weenie white or pastel-colored lie will do the trick. Take for example a conversation with a potential guest in which you are told that so and so will be near you on the Fourth of July weekend. Simply state that it’s a shame you can’t get together then, because you are planning a trip as well. Too bad!
If you can’t head them off at the pass and a visit is inevitable, discuss the departure date with your guests BEFORE they arrive. Three days is usually all even the best of us can stand, respecting that old adage about fish and guests smelling after that. To avoid hassles and arguments, the visit should be limited and clearly defined. This can be done diplomatically with the question, “How long can you stay?” That works better than, “when are you leaving?” for obvious reasons.
Remember that all things, including relatives and friends, have, know and respect boundaries if they are imposed. No one can overstep unless your guilt or whatever operating system you function best under allows it. One way to shorten even a weekend visit would be to say something like, “We would love to have you here Friday night, but we can’t. How about coming over on Saturday afternoon?” Hopefully, that will break up the visit into a few tolerable pieces. If even that seems too long, maybe these people whoever they are, should not visit you at all!
Whatever you do, remember it’s your house and your rules. If all else fails, jump out the window, go to a nearby hotel, and leave the rest of your family to deal with unwanted guests!
Happy whatever!
Related Reading:
http://forums.families.com/easy-party-ideas,t36833