Often, when we think of ethnic differences in a marriage, we think of a mixed-race marriage, but today I’m talking about something else – I’m talking about the ethnic roots we all have within us regardless of our nationality. Americans aren’t just Americans, you know – everyone who lives here has ancestors that immigrated over at some point, be it within the last ten years or two hundred years ago. We have English, Dutch, French, Swiss, Scandanavian, Japanese, African … we are truly a melting pot as a nation.
My ancestors came here a long, long time ago, so I’m as American as I can be, right? Well, sure, but I still carry traits that belong to my ancestors.
I’m about 13% Norwegian. From my Norwegian ancestors, I get my social inclinations – I like to be social, and yet I also like to be alone at times. My intense emotional focus is a Norwegian trait, as is my sense of fairness … don’t violate my sense of fairness. Because of those intense emotions, see. My sense of humor is also a Norwegian trait.
I’m about 45% Welsh. From my Welsh ancestors, I get my emotional sensitivity and my communicativeness. I have technical skills and can figure out how things work.
The rest of me is comprised of English, with smatterings of German, Scottish, Irish –that’s where my sympathetic nature comes in.
When you’re looking at relationships, it might be useful to note where your partner’s ancestors were from. If he/she is Dutch, you might notice stubbornness, which is a huge Dutch trait. If he/she is French, you’ll find that they like to talk about their feelings. If they’re Danish, you might find that they have a lot of business sense, and the Swedes like to tell it how it is. If you’re dealing with something that seems particularly irksome to you, you might find it helpful to be able to say, “She’s really being forceful right now, but she’s Swedish, and this is a Swedish trait, so I can be patient with her, knowing that it’s a natural inclination. I can share my feelings about her attitude, but I should know that she’s not necessarily doing it on purpose.”
Of course, each of these traits has its positive and its negative side, and it should also be noted that not every trait comes from your ancestors—there are traits we have that simply are part of our personalities. But you might find it helpful to learn more about your partner’s family tree, and gain insight into who they are and what their DNA is telling them to do.
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