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How Many Times Should I Turn My Cheek?

So I just had surgery on my foot and I am supposed to be staying off of it and now all of a sudden my sister in law wants to bring dinner over. I feel like I am in some sort of alternate universe or the pain meds are really doing something weird. I know they may make me nice but should they be making her nicer?

I know that sounds mean but when we have had so many issues throughout the years and we have had little to no support from her. Even when I was going through chemo and radiation she never once took our kids for the day or night. Now with this one surgery she is all of a sudden showing up with dinner and a floral arrangement.

Now I was gracious and called to say Thank you for the dinner and flowers but I am still stunned. I have given many chances to my sister in law over the last 13 years and each time she says she is going to be nice I get encouraged and then end up getting punched in the gut when she reverts right back to her old mean self.

It feels almost like a test; tests to see if I am dumb enough to trust her again. Have you ever heard the saying “Hurt me once, shame on you. Hurt me twice shame on you and there won’t be a third time.”? Well it is way past the third time and up until now I kept giving her the benefit of the doubt. The last time I was hurt I said that was it, I was done. I explained that I no longer was willing to give her any more chances.

So what do I do now? I think for now I am going to sit and wait to see how the next few months go. I don’t think that I would ever let her close to me again. I don’t think I can ever consider her a friend, I tried that before and just got kicked back down. I thought I was out of high school and this makes me feel like I am right back there.

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About Tammy Woolard

My name is Tammy and I am 40 year old mother of 3 wonderful children who came to us through domestic adoption. Although we did not have any fertility issues we chose adoption because there are so many kids that did not ask to be born but truly want a family to love. We did research on adoption choices and decided on domestic adoption through CPS. You would be surprised the differences between each agency. The adoption process is nothing like you see in the movies. I am also a 5 year breast cancer survivor. When I was diagnosed my kids were 3, 5 and 7 I did so much research I may have driven my Dr. a little crazy but that is ok it is my body not his.