Periodically, I try to write about the trials and tribulations of the family sleep “issues” because this seems to be one of the topics that comes up most often in conversations among parents—especially newer parents of young children. Napping, how many hours of sleep a child needs, the exact arrangement of those hours, where the child sleeps, etc. are all big concerns for many parents. Now that my three are nearly grown and I look back, though, I wonder just how much of an impact or how much control I have actually had in shaping their sleep habits…
I do think that the fact that all three of my children can sleep anywhere—they are not particularly sensitive or picky about where they sleep, how much noise is going on, etc. comes from conditioning. A bustling family and my determination that since conditions were never going to be “ideal” for sleeping we all ought to just get used to it probably influenced all three of them. They can each doze off and nap on the loveseat in a houseful of people, or curl up on a train and sleep decently. They also don’t have any trouble adjusting to new beds, staying in hotels or being houseguests. I think the fact that I was so flexible and set the expectation from the time they were tiny did have something to do with their easy sleep conditions.
However, they each have their own internal clocks and habits and no matter how much I tried to get them all on the same schedule or shift them to my schedule, they have still been on their own sleep paths in that department. There were times when I really wanted them to go to bed at 8 or 9 pm and be ready for school or day care at 7:30 am. For some, this might work for a while, but there was always someone who seemed to be on his or her own internal sleep mission. I think I have adjusted to their sleep habits at least as much, if not more, than they have been shaped by my influence!
Catnaps, Naps and Your Toddler