Raise your hand if you NEVER argue with your kids.
Scores of childhood experts claim that parents should take the high road and never quarrel with their kids. Of course, we don’t how many of those “experts” have kids of their own, and of those that do, how many share living space with tempestuous teens who could care less if you want them off the phone RIGHT.THIS.INSTANT.
My young daughter is nowhere near teen-dom, but I still find myself arguing with her over issues including picking up her toys, not running around in Target’s crowded parking lot and exercising good manners.
Of course, I categorize my side of our verbal exchanges as “reasoning” with her. After all, what reasonable parent argues with a 5-year-old?
Argue, bicker, quarrel, “reason”… whatever you call the verbal disagreements you have with your children, they add up.
In fact, according to a new study, families waste four solid days per year arguing.
Just four days?
A survey of 3,000 British families found that arguments break out among family members about three times per day and average about 15 minutes. When you add it all up, you are looking at roughly 96 hours of arguing in the course of a year.
British researchers say TV, household chores and attitude are the main causes of family tensions.
AND, researchers also made note of this interesting tidbit: mothers cause most of the quarrels.
Sure, blame the mother—-AGAIN!
According to the study, moms kick-start arguments when kids don’t follow family rules and when they feel as though they are being taken for granted. In addition, excessive TV viewing and high phone bills also irked moms enough to get into verbal tussles with their children.
Bad, bad mom for pointing out junior’s flaws and wanting him to take responsibility for his actions and grow up to be a civilized law-abiding citizen.
Interestingly, the study also delved into what happens when arguments reach a crescendo. According to researchers, daughters were most likely to slam doors during an argument, while fathers preferred to go for a long drive to cool off.
Slamming doors and screeching tires aside, researchers note that arguments “play a vital role in building and strengthening bonds within the family and act as a release valve for family members, so minor arguments do play a positive role in family life.”
Still, researchers maintain that it is “worthwhile counting slowly to ten sometimes.”
I’ll try to remember that the next time I get a door slammed in my face.
How often do you argue with your kids?
Related Articles:
Do You Discipline Your Child in Public?
Teaching Your Toddler to Lose Gracefully
Do You Punish Your Kids For Swearing?
Do Your Kids Need a Manners Makeover?