Unlike some other parents, one of my best friends from grade school, who mothers a rambunctious 9-year-old, has no qualms admitting that she yells at her son.
“If it were not so darn effective, I wouldn’t do it,” she reminds me on a regular basis.
I couldn’t help but think of my BFF, when reading the tsunami of comments generated by a single New York Times blog post. In it the writer, a mother of three young boys, details a moment when caves to fatigue and frustration and completely melts down in front of her sons. Crayons fly, along with a few choice words, that I’m sure we’ve all uttered at some point in our lives.
It’s a very well written piece, and proves that parents are human too. But that’s not what drew me to the article. What shocked me was the massive amount of readers who wrote in thanking the writer for being so honest about her parental shortcomings.
Some parents admitted to crying when reading the piece. Tears of relief apparently fell from their eyes upon learning that there were other parents out there (and one with a high-profile job no less) who also unleashed parental temper tantrums in front of their impressionable children from time to time.
Perhaps the comments shocked me so much because I don’t know a single parent who hasn’t had to resort to yelling at their child at some point in their lives. Think about it; when you see your 4-year-old darting out into a busy street to retrieve a ball do you slowly sashay over to him and begin a reasonable discussion about his bad choice or do you tell him to NEVER, EVER, EVER, EVER, DO THAT AGAIN!! EVER, EVER… OR ELSE!
Granted there is a difference between yelling at your child in times of danger and screaming at him over the small stuff. I’ve noticed that parents who make a habit of doing the latter typically don’t get the response they are looking for. After all, if you constantly scream at a young child, over time, he or she becomes immune to it and it loses its effectiveness.
Do you think it is wrong for parents to yell at their children? How often do you scream at yours?
Related Articles:
Do You Get Angry with Your Child? I Do, Because Anger is a Natural Feeling.
The Uses and Management of Anger
When Did You Start Appreciating Your Parents?
Becoming the Mom You Never Thought You’d Be