I’m a stay-at-home, work-at-home mom. My husband works full-time out of the home. Because I homeschool, and because I’m here all day, I know very well what’s been going on with the kids, their chores, their school, and behavior. Because he’s been gone all day, he has no clue … unless I send him a long string of complaining e-mails, which I have been known to do from time to time. And because kids will be kids, they love to pounce on him as soon as he comes home and ask him for all the things I told them they couldn’t have.
When our children were much younger, it was difficult to keep the balance between parents. He would walk in the door, get hit up for stuff, and wouldn’t know if he should or shouldn’t give in. So we hit upon a plan, and it has worked fabulously for us.
As soon as my husband gets home from work, we go into our bedroom and lock the door. We then spend about ten minutes catching each other up on our day. He’ll tell me if anything was particularly stressful, and I’ll fill him in on what he missed at home. We also talk about the rest of the day—what errands need to be run, what appointments or meetings we might have that night, and how we want to manage the evening hours. When we are finally brave enough to walk out of our bedroom and face the world again, we have a game plan, and we’re united. My husband knows not to give one of the children computer time (she decked her little brother, and so she can’t play on the computer) and he knows that I need his help with dinner. At the same time, I know he had a bad day at work, so I’m aware that he needs to go to bed early.
Whenever we miss this powwow, we sorely miss it. Meeting together in private, just for a few minutes each day, brings us closer together, gets us on the same page, and allows us to be united in our goals, in discipline, and in schedules. We highly recommend it.
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