Many people tell me that they could never homeschool. They always have a very good and valid reason whey they could not do it. I understand what they are saying because many of the same reasons nearly kept me from homeschooling. I almost didn’t homeschool because I felt alone. I almost didn’t homeschool because I didn’t understand my options. I almost didn’t homeschool because I thought my family would not approve. I almost didn’t homeschool because I didn’t think I had the patience to do it. I almost didn’t homeschool because I was afraid of the responsibility. One of the biggest reasons I almost didn’t homeschool was because I was afraid of losing myself.
The first time my husband and I discussed homeschooling, I was completely against it. It didn’t help that my first child was about a month old, and hadn’t slept in those for months. I am pretty sure I was also dealing with post-partum depression at the time.
My husband came home from work and began telling me about a co-worker whose kids were being homeschooled. This was the mid 1990’s when homeschooling was more of a fringe activity, and I had never heard of such a thing. So he begins to excitedly tell me about how this person’s wife is teaching their kids instead of sending them to school. Meanwhile I am laying there on the bed, completely mentally and physically exhausted and without the least bit of patience for such a conversation. When he finished telling me about how cool it must be for the kids to not have to put up with some of the tortures that we encountered growing up, I stared at him with daggers in my eyes.
While the exact words I used in that conversation should not be repeated, I essentially told him that the deal we had made was for me to stay home until our kids were in school, and then I could go back to working on my career. I asked if he wanted to take away my shoes and get me immediately pregnant again as well. I felt that being asked to homeschool was the same as taking away my rights to have a life outside of the family.
When my post partum depression ended, I realized that homeschooling wasn’t as bad as I had assumed. Over the years, I met a few homeschooling mothers who didn’t seem like slaves to the family. When my kids stared school, I began to see how another approach might serve them better.
Many years have passed since that first discussion as homeschooling. Many years have also passed since my husband’s “I told you so dance”, when I brought up the subject to him. Five years have passed since we actually started homeschooling our kids. The fact of the matter is, I feel like I have gained more than I lost.