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I Have a Dream

My daughter’s first grade is spreading the Martin Luther King Jr. Day theme out over the month by having one student per day share with the class their “dream for the future”. I spent some time on Sunday helping her organize her presentation.

I have always thrilled to Reverend King’s voice and vision. But suddenly it seems a bit more personal than before. Whenever I was asked to “share a dream” for the future of our world, it was usually about somebody else. A good dream, yes, compassionately motivated and earnestly desired. I was willing to help contribute to it. But my dream didn’t have a lot of personal emotional resonance. It was about a cause, not a personal reality. I kind of took it for granted that I didn’t have a lot at stake personally.

Even when I adopted internationally, I thought that living in a city with such a large proportion of Asian residents would forestall most if not all problems. If nothing else, my daughters know that I share the experience of being in the minority on occasion. I’ve taken my daughters to storytime at the local library and I’ve been the only white person in the room.

There was one time at a local playground (ironically at probably the most diverse public school in the district) when a girl of about ten came up, asked (me, not my daughter), “Can she speak English? What is she? She doesn’t look like an American.” I asked my daughter if she wanted to answer. She shyly indicated that she didn’t, so I told the girl that Meg was American and Americans look all different ways. But in general, people respond positively to the girls.

I’m just becoming aware that that’s likely to change when they are older. A family member who had a frustrating experience with a post office clerk the other day said. “She just couldn’t get it. She was Asian…” then they looked at me and stopped. While I realize the assumption here was likely about language ability more than skin color, I still had a mental “flash-forward”. I pictured my very bright and extremely helpful daughter home from college, taking a holiday job at the post office—and in my mind’s eye I saw dozens of tired people jockeying to get in anybody else’s line. Who has the energy to deal with communication hassles during the holidays, after all? People would never take the chance to realize that she might be the most capable and helpful worker there.

It’s not uncommon for Arab-Americans to be stopped at airports and even while driving cars. What if the next big conflict is with North Korea? Then whose kids won’t “look American enough”?

So there’s now a little more emotional resonance when I say that my heartfelt dream and prayer for the future is Reverend King’s: “that my little children may be judged not on the color of their skin but on the content of their character”.

See these related blogs:
Students Should Be In School Today. . .

Seeking Out Diversity

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About Pam Connell

Pam Connell is a mother of three by both birth and adoption. She has worked in education, child care, social services, ministry and journalism. She resides near Seattle with her husband Charles and their three children. Pam is currently primarily a Stay-at-Home-Mom to Patrick, age 8, who was born to her; Meg, age 6, and Regina, age 3, who are biological half-sisters adopted from Korea. She also teaches preschoolers twice a week and does some writing. Her activities include volunteer work at school, church, Cub Scouts and a local Birth to Three Early Intervention Program. Her hobbies include reading, writing, travel, camping, walking in the woods, swimming and scrapbooking. Pam is a graduate of Seattle University and Gonzaga University. Her fields of study included journalism, religious education/pastoral ministry, political science and management. She served as a writer and editor of the college weekly newspaper and has been Program Coordinator of a Family Resource Center and Family Literacy Program, Volunteer Coordinator at a church, Religion Teacher, Preschool Teacher, Youth Ministry Coordinator, Camp Counselor and Nanny. Pam is an avid reader and continuing student in the areas of education, child development, adoption and public policy. She is eager to share her experiences as a mother by birth and by international adoption, as a mother of three kids of different learning styles and personalities, as a mother of kids of different races, and most of all as a mom of three wonderful kids!