As a single parent, I have to admit that my kids probably get more of a say and influence over what goes on in our home than they would if there was another adult in the house. It’s hard for me to know what I would be like as a parent of teens if I was sharing the responsibility with another adult in the same house. Since there are three kids and just one me, it would be egotistical and downright untrue for me to say that I don’t get outnumbered and find myself trying to balance mom-as-authority with kids-as-people…
My kids help make out the grocery lists and even help with the grocery shopping now. They get to express their likes and dislikes and like the story about “The Little Red Hen”–they’ve learned that the more involved and helpful they are, the more influence and say they actually get. The kid or kids who actually help with the shopping and cooking have more influence than ones who don’t. My kids have influence as to what type of shampoo and soap we buy, the colors we might choose for the new bathroom towels and where to move the furniture. Sure, I’m the ultimate boss, but we do all live together. If I had a partner or spouse, I might not open things up for discussion as much as I do as a single parent.
I think as long as we maintain healthy boundaries and don’t forget that we are the parents and they are the children–the inclusion of kids in decisions and discussions is inevitable. I have friends and family I can go to for “grown up” stuff, but when it comes to our living arrangements and what we do and eat, my kids and I have become more of an egalitarian team–and I do think this is typical and due to the realities of being a single parent family.
Also: Kids With Single Parents Learn Life Skills
Fun Things to do With Your Kids at Night as a Single Parent