“I told you so.” Those are words that grate on my nerves. And while that might not have been the exact phrase uttered, it was what I heard.
Yes, I knew when my 18-year-old son signed up for the military that I had to expect a lot of things. Like the initial separation, the lack of contact I would have while in basic training, the second goodbye after seeing him graduate and then learning what his first duty base station would be.
I’m no dummy. Of course I knew that he could end up receiving an assignment overseas. And if so, I also knew he could be in a potentially volatile area. And yes, I most certainly understand the implications of the job he has with Security Forces.
I know all these things…but it doesn’t make each stage of the process any easier.
A few days ago we learned where my son would be stationed for his first assignment. I could tell he was afraid to tell me over the phone. He seemed hesitant. So I braced myself.
I imagined a few places but never once did this country cross my mind. In fact, if I were to be completely honest…I was pretty sure he would end up in the United States, preferably no more than 12 hours from home.
Instead, he will be in a country that borders Syria, Iraq and Iran. And by the way, this is supposed to make me feel better (at least according to some). Where will he be stationed?
Turkey.
I sat there for several seconds. Suddenly my brain was freezing and I had to quick do a search on Google maps. There it was, right in front of me…thousands and thousands of miles away.
I tried to sound upbeat about it. But I couldn’t…and I cried.
The next few days I felt like I was walking with a cloud over my head. While I certainly appreciated the well wishes and show of support, I didn’t appreciate what felt like, “I told you so.”
In other words, I knew going into this he could end up overseas. But it still hurts to hear it’s a reality.
I sure have a brand new appreciation for military moms. And I will be very sadly counting down the days until he leaves in January, 2013.
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