We go through an agonizing amount of time deciding on what to name baby. Do we name them after someone in the family? Do we blend names? A grandmother’s name with another’s middle name? Do we name the son after the father or follow the family tradition and attach a junior or a third to their name? Do name the daughter after the mother and give her an affectionate nickname to separate the two?
However we decide to name our children, once we have given them their name – we will often use pet names for them as they are growing and developing. For a long time we referred to our daughter as the Tiny or the Midget – she was our mini-me – after a fashion. Though her name was Cassidy Joy – we also called her CJ for a very long time.
Just before her second birthday, she like many other babies before her – began to refer to herself in the third person. She did not call herself CJ, Tiny or Midget – she called herself Cassidy. Somewhere in all those conversations – we called her Cassidy often enough that she identified herself by that name. So from that day forward – she has been Cassidy, not CJ, not Tiny and not Midget – though we do use the occasional sweetheart, doll face and honey. Princess is another popular one for her – though she calls herself Mommy’s Princess.
Respecting Their Choice
It’s important that when your babies begin identifying themselves by the name of their choice that you respect that choice. We identify a great many things about ourselves by what we choose to be called. Case in point, I know a little boy that when he was born there was a great deal of discord between the mother and the father. The name they chose was a rather large one, but he was referred to by a variety of nicknames and names – eventually, he decided on one specifically that he would call himself – his father and family refused to call him that.
Although, like my daughter, he identified himself in the third person this way – his father and family refused to acknowledge that. While this baby is now approaching this 7th birthday, his father’s side of the family along with his father calls him by a name that he does not identify himself with. It has created a gulf between himself and his father.
Imagine, if you will, if someone you loved refused to call you by the name you identified yourself with – it would cause injury and problems and hurt. So when babies begin to identify themselves in the third person, respect their choice. You got the privilege of naming them – give them the privilege of identifying themselves.
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