While married, couples typically have other married friends, which is what you would expect. However, after going through a divorce or death of a spouse, you often find yourself with few or no friends at all. Remember, the old married friends still care about you but they live a different lifestyle that makes socializing difficult. Over time, these friendships often fade, leaving you to start making new friends.
For single parents, having no one close to confide in or to laugh with can be devastating, leaving a person to feel alone and isolated. Therefore, if you now find yourself a single parent, it is critical for you and your children’s sake to start initiating healthy, new friendships. This way, you have an outlet and support system and in many cases, your new single friends will have children in the same situation as your children.
To meet new friends, you need to throw yourself in situations where you can meet people. For instance, you will have to branch out socially, going to places where other nice, single people go. In this case, you can meet single people at work, through arts and crafts shows, neighborhood block parties, or even consider joining a single parents’ club. Additionally, if you have a special interest such as horseback riding, sewing, cooking, travel, or whatever the case may be, join some clubs where you will meet friends.
I remember after my divorce, my kids were young and I did lose all but one of my married friends. I felt hurt and very alone. I loved swimming and working out so I got up the courage to take my kids to the community pool one Saturday afternoon by myself. As they were swimming, I laid out in the sun where a woman about my age laid down with her two kids jumping into the pool. Over the course of the next hour, we had struck up a conversation and soon discovered we had so much in common. That meeting was 21 years ago this past August and she is still my best friend – more of a sister and our kids are still friends.
Sometimes, just taking the step to reach out is all you need. If you have a younger daughter that is interested in dance or volleyball, find an organization that she can connect with, where you too will meet other single and married people. If your son who wants to play ball or get involved with gymnastics, you can do the same by locating a good program. In addition to giving your children a new opportunity to learn and develop the body, you have the chance of initiating new friendships.
My Best Friend Moved Away – Nancy Carlson