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Instead of Just One Session of “The Talk,” Expect Several

It is hard for me to believe, but there are still plenty of parents who think that sex education is a one-time obligation. While they may have the best of intentions, they wonder when is the right time to have “the TALK” and be done with their parental obligations regarding this discomforting subject. Instead of one, all-encompassing “talk,” however, most experts recommend that parents be prepared for regular and repeated age-appropriate discussions and be open and available to answer questions as they pop up.

Maybe instead of one big TALK, parents can think of how to lay an early foundation and gradually add to that with a child. Many find that a combination of books, conversation, and honestly answering those questions that children ask is a good way to lay that sex education foundation. While you do not want to give a child more than he or she is capable of processing, you also don’t want to underestimate the information and misinformation they may be receiving elsewhere. All of that needs to be taken into account. As much as we might hope that if we get to our children early we can totally combat all of that other information that just isn’t the case. Instead we need to find a way to work with it and let our children know they can come and ask us any questions AT ALL that might pop up.

Additionally, I think (as well as the experts) that honesty is key—if we start out telling our children fairy-tales or made-up stories to try to explain where babies come from, we will start out setting ourselves up for being seen as untrustworthy. Your children will talk about this with other children even when they are quite young, so consider how your child will look and feel when he or she is corrected or laughed at by the other children. He is depending on you to give him honest, useful, and appropriate information. If she thinks you cannot be trusted, she will go elsewhere for sex education questions and concerns and you will lose your influence.

It may seem daunting, but sex education really is an ongoing process for parents and children and we want to keep a step-ahead of our children whenever possible (instead of trying to undue damage and influences that might not be helpful.)

See Also the EDUCATION Blog