Consistency is at the root of good parenting, but it’s often necessary for us to introduce new ideas, or make schedule changes, or just help our kids adjust to life’s inevitable changes. Some children are much more resilient and take to new things better than others. In my own family of three children, I have one who is very reluctant to ever make changes and try new things, and is definitely NOT keen on adjustment. Over the years, I’ve had to learn some “tricks” regarding introducing new things, and develop a great deal of patience for the pace and needs of someone who does not like change.
Preparation, flexibility, and attitude are all huge when it comes to introducing something new to a child. And, I am not talking about the child here. I think if the parent puts some thought and preparation in getting ready to introduce something new, and develops a positive and flexible attitude about the change—it can make a big difference in how well the adaptation goes. If we go into it expecting that it will be painful and our child will not take to the changes that is likely to be exactly what happens. However, if we approach things with a positive attitude, expecting that our child will naturally adjust in time—we can create our own reality.
As the parent, you will have to evaluate whether your child adjusts better to new things if they are a surprise, or if it is something that is “eased” into. For some children, having plenty of preparation and information makes all the difference—while others will fuss and worry with too much time to think things over before they happen—a sudden change might be better for this temperament.
Expect that adjusting to new things will take time and provide follow-through and support for a child who has trouble adjusting. BUT, I’ve found it is necessary to be absolutely ready and firm when introducing new changes and to make sure that I don’t give in or give up. It may take more time for an adjustment, but my child needs the security of knowing that the change is definitely going to happen. Then, the next time it is necessary to introduce something new, he or she will have a successful experience to draw on—and mom or dad will have credibility and trust.
See Also: Smoothing Out Transitions and Helping Kids Learn to Wait and Focusing on Problems or Solutions