My kids were burning out. After years spent carting them to and from activities, sports and enrichment opportunities, I admit I was burning out, too. Reflecting on this point in our lives and how we got here, I realized that I fell into the “socialization trap” that many fellow homeschoolers share: if you don’t get your kids out of the house, and often, they will be socially stunted for life! Although I know better, that little nagging voice is the motivation behind our overscheduled days. I can’t imagine carrying the schedule we have and also having my kids in school until 3 or 4pm every day but, amazingly, this is exactly what many American children face every day!
Why are so many children so over-committed and, yet, childhood obesity rates are at an all-time high?
One of the frequent reasons that parents over-schedule their children is to, ironically, make sure that Johnny is keeping up with Tommy from down the street. When your neighbor’s child can play a sonata on the piano, do back-flips in the front yard and perform solos at church on Sunday, it’s very difficult to stop ourselves from feeling like inferior parents. And so the push begins.
If the parents’ inferiority complex was not enough, often children, themselves, feel pushed to compete with their peers. And if they escape childhood, unscathed, they likely won’t escape the college preparatory pressure to prepare a Well Rounded high school resume.
Meanwhile, we are so busy carting our children to and from activities and events that there is no time for a proper dinner! Even if we have time to eat at home, we certainly don’t have time to cook it so over-processed convenience foods become a staple. And that’s only if the child is lucky! Many children are living on fast food burgers and fries because home is only a luxury seen at bedtime!
But sports are great exercise! And enrichment is not only good for the mind, it is good for the soul and, most of all, it’s fun! Cultivating an extra-curricular talent is great for self-esteem. Keeping kids busy and off the street is one big bonus, for sure! So how do we strike a balance between enriching our children’s lives and burning them out?
The key, as in most things in life, is moderation. Make it a family rule that each child will only participate in one extra-curricular activity per season. Make sure you are home for at least one meal together during the day. Leave enough time in your lives so that, even if dinner isn’t your “together” meal, you have time to prepare healthy meals to-go. Make sure your child is allowed to drive his or her own interests and respect that what you think is an important activity might not be something that your child agrees with you on. In other words, if you think the piano is very important, take lessons yourself but little Anna take dance like she begs for! And remember, play is as important as school and sports and other structured enrichment. Make time for it and you’ll avoid the big burn-out.