What do you teach your children about religion when you are not religious? Despite being raised in a Jewish home, I am not a religious person. I do not belong to a synagogue, keep kosher, or even follow most of the basic rules of Judaism. But I still consider myself Jewish.
Being Jewish to me is being a part of something bigger than me, something that transcends time, and something that has been around for thousands of years. And, despite constant efforts to eradicate it, something that will continue to survive for thousands more. Being a Jew means being a part of a culture and heritage that embraces knowledge, family and the love of giving to others. That is fine for me as an adult, but what do I teach my children?
Before we got married my husband and I discussed all the big marriage issues: money, future goals, children and religion. We agreed on everything; we had the same hopes and dreams for the future. We both wanted children, and I wanted them to be raised Jewish. My Jewish upbringing helped shaped who I am today. I enjoyed being Jewish as a child and I wanted to share that experience with my children. Since my husband does not have a strong religious affiliation, he was raised Christian, but as he describes it: his family belonged to the congregation of “Our Holy Mother of Sleeping Late,” he agreed to the Jewish upbringing. But he firmly put the responsibility in my hands: it was up to me to decide what raising Jewish children means.
All this is fine in theory, but now that we have three daughters, what do I teach them? Do we join a synagogue? Do we send them to a Jewish dayschool Do we move to a predominately Jewish area of town? Do we keep Kosher? Do we follow rules that I do not necessarily agree with, just because it is considered Jewish? What do you teach your children when you are not sure what you believe?