I hate it when Mick and I argue. It doesn’t happen that often but when it does it leaves a sour taste. More often than not, our arguments occur near and about the computer.
I am no-one’s idea of a computer expert and so when I run into trouble I call on Mick. Unfortunately trying to explain what is happening and how it got that way, which I usually don’t know, presents a problem. I’m still convinced computer gremlins exist because the computer often seems to do things I have never told it to do, but that’s another story. So trying to explain is part of the problem.
The other problem is my computer has a different program, so he’s not familiar with where things are on it that are obvious to me. Patience is needed on both our parts and actually listening to what each other is saying.
The trouble is people don’t always listen to what they are told. I had this experience recently with a job I had commissioned. I had painstakingly explained to the craftsman what I wanted and why. When the job came back it was nothing like I’d asked for. The problem was the person had either not listened clearly to what I asked for or had decided he could improve on what I had told him. Sadly because it did not match the specifics I had given and the reason behind it, the work was unsuitable.
It happens too often marriage. One partner doesn’t listen but assumes they know what the other person is saying. Or they think they know better and can improve it by following their own ideas. In a marriage neither of these attitudes are helpful.
We need to listen carefully and make sure we are clear about what is being said or asked for or required. Then if something is not clear or we have a better idea, that is the time to raise it and talk it through. It is better than just going ahead and doing your own thing only to then find out it is not what the other person wanted at all.
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