‘It’s like the end of the world,’ high school kids said about the dust storms that hit Australia this week and turned the sky red. A combination of gale force winds and drought swept red dust from Broken Hill, far out west in NSW, right across the state even to places like Sydney and here which are on the coast.
As we were out driving in the car, you could tell the cars that had been looked after and those that had been exposed to the elements. Those which had been garaged were fine. Those which hadn’t were covered in red dust. Just as you could tell which cars had been cared for and looked after, you can tell those marriages that are cared for and looked after too as well as those that aren’t.
Maybe it’s not as obvious as red dust but the signs of a marriage neglected are still there. The signs of a marriage that is looked after stand out too. So what are the signs of a neglected marriage?
The husband and wife rarely talk to each other. More often they are sniping, criticizing and make sarcastic or negative remarks to, or about, each other,
They rarely have physical contact e.g. never walk hand in hand. Sometimes one even walks a few feet in front of the other, rather than walking together.
They have few, if any, common interests but appear to live independently of each other.
The man or woman or both is always looking at and flirting with other members of the opposite sex. They’re worried about what they’re missing.
They rarely laugh and have a negative view of life and marriage.
By contrast, the marriage that has been cared for looks like this.
The husband and wife talk to each there about all sorts of things. They compliment their spouse and tell others of the good or helpful things their spouse does.
They walk hand in hand, arm in arm. They kiss goodbye or hello and just lay a hand on each other in a caress when passing.
They enjoy a number of similar interests. They enjoy spending time together and it shows!
Each person in the marriage is content and happy with their spouse and doesn’t waste time looking at and thinking of others. The only person they flirt with is their spouse.
They laugh and enjoy life together. They have a positive view of life and marriage.
Which best describes your marriage?
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