When Wayne and I first started dating back in the mid-80s, one of Denver’s papers (can’t remember now if it was the Rocky Mountain News or the Denver Post) ran the syndicated comic strip “Love Is…” drawn by Kim Casali. My sister was the one who had first introduced me to it, but Wayne was the one who gave it meaning.
You see, even way, way, way back then we had a commuter relationship. I lived with my mom in Denver where I went to high school; he lived down in Gunnison where he went to college.
Most relationships don’t survive a month like this. This is how we spent our first four years together. (Two while I was in high school, then my first two at college before he moved down and we moved in together.)
What kept us going? Love.
Sounds a little too simplistic, doesn’t it? In one respect it was that simple, yet it also took a lot of work.
Before cell phones, text messages, or even email we predominantly communicated the good old-fashioned way: by writing letters. At least one letter every week, but usually it was a good deal more than that.
Inside those letters we’d often tuck a “Love Is…” snippet. It signified our glorious uninterrupted summers together where we’d either clip a particularly touching or meaningful “Love Is…” and give it to one another that day, or ask at some point during the day, “Did you see the ‘Love Is…’?”
Last night was another late working one for Wayne. I had a volleyball tournament that kept me away until almost 10 p.m. He still wasn’t home when I got in.
When the phone rang at 11 p.m. I assumed it was him. No one else would call at that hour –unless it was an emergency.
Which it was.
My sister was calling to tell me our mom had been admitted to the hospital. She’s not in the greatest mental health these days, but now her physical health is in jeopardy. X-rays revealed her right lung is fully encapsulated with doctors-don’t-know-what and there are also suspicious nodes they’ll be biopsying later this week. Basically, she’s in the hospital for a few days at least. And if those nodes are cancerous, we’ve got a rough road ahead.
As soon as I found out I called Wayne. As soon as he could, he rushed home.
I had no words to express the depths of my sympathy when his dad passed. All I knew to do was hug him and hold him hard. Last night he understood that and reciprocated in kind.
Love is so many things. That’s why Kim Casali had different “Love Is…” cartoons for every day of the week in papers nationwide for years.
Today as I’m preparing for perhaps an extended trip to my hometown to help my mom and sister, I’m reflecting on all the things love is. Because I know in the weeks and months to come I will be separated from them periodically.
But I also know love is always there when I need it, and love is always waiting for me when I return. Wayne’s love is what has pulled me through tough times before, and his love will be the light guiding me through this dark time too.
Find the books Love Is… and Love Is…in Bloom (compilations of Kim Casali’s cartoons) in the Families.com Deals section.
Courtney Mroch writes about animals great and small in Pets and the harmony and strife that encompasses married life in Marriage. For a full listing of her articles click here.