Marriage isn’t a one off choice and that’s it, marriage is about choosing every day. Choosing to put someone else’s needs about your own. It’s choosing to be committed and stay committed and not keep looking around and wonder what if. . It’s choosing to look forward to each day with the one you’re with, rather than look back at the past and wonder what might have been.
Marriage is offering support and encouragement to your spouse in the things they do. The other day advance copies of my two news children’s books for young readers arrived on our doorstep. My husband was so excited for me and encouraging of my in my writing as he always has been.
Similarly I support him in the things he does and I try and do things to please him.
When we were moving Mick suggested we’d sell as the pool table as it wouldn’t fit in the house.
‘No,’ I said, ‘Keep it. You’ve waited so long to get it and always wanted one. We’ll find a way to make it work.’
So it came. Ever since we’ve moved it’s been sitting in the garage unused. I was convinced we could make it fit if we moved some of the furniture around and got rid of one piece. ‘Let’s try it,’ I suggested after the re-shuffling of furniture.
Given my arm has not got much strength I wasn’t going to be much help in lifting so Mick found a creative way around the problem. He rigged up a trolley to wheel it on. Once he lifted it up onto the step from the garage to the house and onto the trolley while I helped ot steady, we managed okay on our tiled floors, despite a few minor near mishaps. When we got it set up he couldn’t wait to try it. Okay, maybe the family room is more crowded than before but it’s worth it for him to be happy and have something that gives him pleasure.
Marriage is like that, not giving up when an answer or a solution to a problem isn’t apparent first up but keeping on turning it over and looking for a way forward and a way to make the other person happy or to love well.\
‘To love well… that’s something else. It’s a choosing – something done again and again. again and again,’ a quote from Chris, a character in Where the River Ends by Charles Martin. Have to say I agree.
Related blogs
Are Men Really the Weaker Sex?
A Novel Approach to Marital Advice