Today’s families are often so scheduled that they have little time for actually having fun together as a family. Last night we watched “Wife Swap” although one family was odd, as far as normal standards, pretending to live in the Middle Ages, not having a telephone, dressing in middle ages clothing, and eating middle ages food, they did spend a lot of time together as a family. In the other family the mother worked two jobs, the kids were busy with activities and friends, they rarely ate dinner together, and little time was spent as a family.
Because of the wife swap this second family came to appreciate family time. They rearranged their schedules; the mom quit working two jobs, and made time for each other. They began eating dinner each night and doing family activities like playing cards.
(The other family realized that their children were too sheltered and began going out more and encouraging their children to develop friendships outside the family.)
Unfortunately in today’s society more and more families are becoming a victim to “scheduled family hyperactivity.” In a 2001 USA Today article the author describes a family where the son, age 11, was involved in six different activities, and the daughter, age 8, had several as well. As a result the family was constantly jumping from one activity to another with no family interaction.
Dr. Bill Doherty, author of “Take Back Your Kids,” says that for many families ”family time is whatever is left over after they’ve fulfilled their commitments to work, extracurricular activities, and academics.”
The family I mentioned before decided to take a break from activities and suddenly found that they had time for each other. Two years later they have never gone back. Their son plays one instrument and their daughter is involved in nothing.
A family that I know meets every Sunday night to plan out the week’s activities. Their three daughters are involved in multiple activities and often have to give up something because it conflicts with something else. The activities instead of family time are the priority. Contrast that with another family with six kids that I feel is a very close family. They even have their own family cheer. (How cool is that?) In their family they allow each of their children age 8 or older to choose one activity to be involved in. If they choose football in the fall that means that they don’t get to play baseball in the spring. But that does mean that there is always time for family activities.
Take a look at your own lives and make sure that you are putting a priority on family time instead of filling your child’s life with activities while worthwhile are not more valuable than the family.