We talked some earlier today about the trouble a wife may have with her interest in sexual relations due to a weight gain and her own self perception, but there are others reasons why sexual relations between a couple may become troubled or distant. When one partner or the other is asexual, there can be a distinct drop in the sexual relations between the man and the woman.
What Does it Mean to be Asexual?
An asexual individual is one who lacks any interest in sexual relations. They may have once been described as frigid or impotent, but it’s a genuine disinterest in sex and often lack sexual arousal. An asexual individual will not see a lack of sexual arousal as a problem to be corrected and they do not seek fulfillment in their relationships from the sexual aspects of it. In fact, an asexual individual takes great pleasure in other aspects of the relationship.
However, if one partner is asexual and the other is not, this can lead to great stress and problems in a marriage as one partner struggles with feeling rejected or made to feel undesirable because their partner expresses no sexual interest in them.
It’s important to recognize that while a person may choose to be celibate, asexuality is not a life choice. Asexuality is a part of a person’s make up, it is a part of who they are and in as much, they lack sexual desire. But being asexual does not mean a person does not want to be involved in a romantic relationship and it does not mean they have no capacity for romantic love.
Most People Are Not Asexual
It’s safe to say that most people are not asexual. It’s also possible for an asexual individual to tolerate sex in an effort to please their non-asexual partner. But merely tolerating sex is hardly conducive to the psychological and emotional well being of your partner. It’s very likely they will be aware that their partner is just tolerating the sexual intimacy.
So what is an asexual to do? Their choices are limited, but they include:
- Engaging in relationships only with other asexuals
- Abandoning notions of romantic involvement and remaining single
- Tolerate a certain amount of sex to please their non-asexual partner
- Make arrangements that allow their more sexually inclined partner to seek satisfaction elsewhere
It’s important to realize that in light of this information, most people are not asexual and that those of us with normal sexual drives do go through dry spells where their interest in sex diminishes – this is very typical around the birth of a child and it has more to do with the biological need of the parents to get used to taking care of a new life and for mothers to recover from the pregnancy and delivery. So don’t fret that you are asexual just because your interest has diminished briefly – most asexual individuals have never been interested in sex.
Have you ever met someone who was asexual?
Related Articles:
No Longer Attracted to Your Spouse?
What Husbands Want When it Comes to Sex
Sleeping Together – The Benefits and the Challenges