The following news story caught my eye and I have to say with all the articles headlining in the news over the rights of same-sex couples to get married (and I’ve more than expressed my opinion in this area so I won’t bore you here), this particular marriage debate definitely refreshed my interest. In this case, it’s an unconventional argument in a more traditional situation.
When A Man Wants to Take His Wife’s Name
In our society and in most of Western Society, it’s traditional for the wife to take her husband’s last name when he marries. I did it. My mother did it. My grandmother did it. I suspect you did it and your mother did it and so forth and so on. But in California, there’s a man who wants to honor the family of the woman he married and in doing so – he wants to take her name.
It’s a lot more complicated than you think though.
When I got married, I had to fill out a few forms and it cost a grand total of a bout $100 in fees to various places including the DMV, the Social Security Administration, U.S. Immigration (my passport) and of course, all the other paper work like my credit cards and more. It took a bit of a time too – I think it was almost six months after the wedding before I had legally established myself as Heather Long.
However, for Michael Buday, who wants to change his name to Bijon – it’s a lot more complicated and it’s a lot more expensive. Under the current California law, he is required to pay $300 in court fees, file a petition and to pay to publicly advertise the fact that he plans to change his name for a minimum of four weeks in a local newspaper.
Filing Suit
Frustrated by what he views as an inequality in the law, Buday has decided to take this matter to court and he has the support of the ACLU. They are planning to sue the California Department of Health Services – this is the department that oversees name changes and marriage licenses.
As it turns out, California is just one of 44 states that possess unbalanced and unequal laws with regard to changing names. There are just six states (Georgia, Hawaii, Iowa, Massachusetts, New York & North Dakota) that allow within their current laws for a man to change his name via marriage exactly as a woman changes her name – in other words, once they have the marriage license, he just fills out the change of name forms and pays the same fees as a woman would and voila – he now has a married name and a maiden name. (Bachelor name?)
The Constitution
The ACLU is citing that the unequal practices with regard to laws governing name changes violates the equal protection clause that the 14th Amendment of the Constitution provides to men and women alike. The name change laws reflect the attitude that women are subordinate to men and that the tradition is that a woman takes her husband’s name.
California does not offer the husband a name change option, he has to go through a regular process of changing name – the same process any individual would if they wanted to change their name whether it was changing their first name, middle name or last name or all of the above.
According to an ACLU press release, Buday’s suit and charge is not about the cost, but the principle. He considers his wife’s father a father figure himself and he wants to honor that family and the home they have made for him within that family.
Gender Equality
Equality for the genders means removing gender specific laws that favor one gender over the other and allowing both the options and protections the other is afforded. I don’t have a problem with a man wanting to take his wife’s name. I don’t have a problem with a man and woman combining their last names to create a new one or any other combination thereof.
I do have a problem with the inequality apparently present here. What do you think? Should the laws be more gender friendly allowing husbands the same rights as wives in matters regarding name change?
Related Articles:
In the News: Women Have Choices, Men Apparently Don’t
Marriage in the News: Traditional Social Structures
Marriage in the News: I Now Pronounce You Ex-Wife & Ex-Husband
Marriage In The News: Jilted Bride Makes Lemonade from Lemons