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MissBimbo.com

There are scads of websites aimed at children designed to increase their I.Q, sharpen their reflexes, teach the capitals of the states, improve their math skills, and teach basic trivia. These sites work hand in hand with school curriculums to help make your child’s Internet experiences fun as well as educational. Missbimbo.com is not one of them.

In a world where women now have more freedom than ever before, where we can now run corporations as well as raise families and garner the respect of both colleagues and critics, why is it that my pre-teen daughter can now go online and bring up her very own bimbo, dress her in immodest clothing, arrange for her to have breast implants, and do it all in the name of fun?

That’s right – when you go to MissBimbo.com, your character is called a bimbo. She needs your constant care, because she obviously is too stupid to take care of herself. Her entire worth is found in how larger her breasts are and how fashion-forward her clothing is. She can even have a facelift, if, heaven forbid, nature was to take its course and give her a wrinkle, but in the land of virtual beauty, there’s no such thing as a wrinkle.

This game is targeted to nine-year-old girls, and according to the creator, Nicolas Jacquart, is “harmless fun.” He goes on to say, “It is not a bad influence for young children. They learn to take care of their bimbos. The missions and goals are morally sound and teach children about the real world.

“If they eat too much chocolate in the game it is bad for their bimbos’ bodies and their happiness levels compared to if they eat fruit and vegetables, which reinforces positive healthy eating messages.

“If they are having problems with boyfriends or at work, the bimbos can talk through them with a psychiatrist.

“The breast operations are just one part of the game and we are not encouraging young girls to have them, just reflecting real life.”

That’s just so sad on so many levels. Let’s take one of the most derrogatory terms you can give a woman and turn it into something sweet and cuddly. Bimbos are too stupid to take care of themselves, so it must be done for them. They’re obviously a reflection of the real world – I mean, doesn’t every woman have a breast augmentation? And aren’t all women who have breast augmentations therefore, bimbos? And thank goodness we can talk to a psychiatrist who will solve all our problems – it would be so awful if we had to, I don’t know, solve our problems ourselves. Please!

If this is a reflection of the real world, I don’t want to live in the real world anymore. Let me be happy in the land of my imagination, where my worth comes from more than my cup size, where I can use the brains I really do have to solve my problems, and where I am respected for what I contribute to those around me. Never wake me up from this dreamland I’m in.

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