So far I have covered mistake #1 that parents of teenagers make, expecting the worse out of this stage of life. The second mistake I am going to talk about is trying to find parenting answers through others.
I know that sounds pretty strange, considering I am technically giving advice. But at the heart of my message is this…every family is different, so you have to learn what’s best for yours.
This doesn’t mean that help from others—whether it comes through books, seminars or blogs—shouldn’t be sought. It doesn’t mean that you can’t be encouraged or inspired by others.
But I will tell you this. No one can tell you how to parent your children best. There is no formula, no model, no one-size-fits-all when it comes to this.
There is a reason we aren’t given manuals. Because every situation will be different. Every lifestyle, physical location, background, personality and personal life experiences will contribute to parenting.
Needless to say, just as no two thumbprints are alike, the same rings true when it comes to our families…no two are alike. So to try and tell someone the right way to parent, well, it doesn’t work.
Believe me, you will run into parents (or maybe you are one) who believes they hold all the answers. Sometimes this is based on results. But those can change.
I remember several years ago being lectured (it didn’t feel like advice) on the importance of homeschooling your children all through their high school years. What was this based on? Positive personal results.
The children were coming out of it faring quite well. That is until one of them was in their early 20’s and then suddenly all heck broke out.
Did homeschooling play a role or not? I don’t think it matters. What I do think is important is that we trust our own instincts more than we do others. Only we know our children best.